Monday, December 28, 2009

Bless you.

December.
Writing, reading, teaching, sneezing. I feel like this just about sums up the last couple of weeks.
December was actually a wonderful month in many ways having to do with experiences, relationships, and forward movement. I feel so much excitement and potential for the upcoming AIB residency, new work, and a studio in the middle of being deconstructed once again, to make it an even MORE effective space for making. It has also been amazingly beautiful here in Seattle this past week, and I feel so fortunate to just "be".



These are a couple of recent images of what I have been making, along with the most current version of my artist's statement.

For now, I am in the middle of a reading marathon to prepare for upcoming seminars in Boston, and recovering (hopefully, now please) from a devastating virus. Well, ok, a cold.


The Blue Moon is on its way...








The ritual of painting is one way that I process change. What remains constant, always, is the mark. Through the mark, I give voice to change in an intuitive way while recognizing that each part of my life is relevant to, and reflected in my work. Intention for my practice forms through my life experiences, and reflection. Through the paintings, I am looking for engagement with the world through a language that communicates differently than words. My practice is a form of call and response with life. It is a conversation that stretches over time and reveals its many truths slowly and quickly. The speed of exchange is an internal, yet visible conversation.
Part of my ongoing personal search for the truth of my practice has been to strip away images that mediate my relationship to the paint. The past several years have presented me with enormous loss. Many of the relationships and places that I grounded myself in for decades, if not my entire life, have shifted. This body of work is an exercise in releasing the pictorial image that I have always relied on as my translator, and replacing it with greater attention to the materiality of the paint, and the use of formal elements to communicate the response to a shifting landscape. Through a mixture of acrylic under-paintings, oil and wax medium on paper and canvas, I am exploring single words, feelings, or ideas, and responding to the intuitive hum in the heart, as I search for the combination of formal elements that express what I want to call out. The time that I give these pieces involves layering, sanding, scraping away and re-building the surface. This very visceral connection with the materials gives voice to the complexity of my personal experience, and a materiality to what sensations my body holds surrounding these experiences, as well as the experience of making. The passage through these paintings took me from ideas of space, to ideas of form. The most recent pieces are looking at form in direct relation to how it is affected by the experience of its surrounding. Art making to process change, marks as a call and a response.

These are the works of this moment.

Sunday, December 6, 2009

And so it ends, and begins.

"Dive"
12" x 8"

oil on paper









So I come to the end of my first semester. A couple of really interesting things have come up for me. In my second to the last session with Helen, she noticed once more the recurrence of certain forms in my work, and brought up the idea of my making 3D forms. The creation of forms would potentially give voice to the pictorial references that are so a part of me, and perhaps give me a new way to interact with them. I imagine they would be a grounding balance to the imaginative components of the abstract work. How abstract would these forms be? It will be fun to discover. This idea immediately appeals to me and takes me back to the end of my BFA work at PAFA, where I was indeed, making all kinds of mixed media forms that directly related to my imagery. I was attaching them to paintings, hanging them in space, and mounting them on the wall. I never fully explored this direction, yet I love the physicality of making objects, and satisfy this drive now through woodblock carving and printing.
Turning to the object again makes sense to me even more after attending a gallery talk by Margie Livingston at the Greg Kucera gallery yesterday. Margie is a painter, but uses objects that she makes as references for her paintings, and as a dialogue between painting and object. Margie's approach really spoke to me as it comes from a place of communication, wonderful abstraction and color, and moves beyond simply creating still life forms to paint from. While I was running today, I thought a great deal about what I saw in Margie's work, what I would like to try, and how to get started. I am excited to get to it!

Margie Livingston
"Big Yellow"
Oil on Linen
90" x 66"
















Helen also asked me to move away from the small studies and begin a 6' x 6' painting. Wheee! I have it primed and ready to go. I can feel it's presence as I stand infront of it, and I so love that. I am very excited about this upcoming semester, and so greatful for the experiences and insights of these past six months.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Where...

"Where"
oil on paper
24" x 36"


I have been having a really tough time getting photos that I am happy with - that actually look like the work - since the season changed. This image has more "white" in it in this photo than in real life, but it gives an idea of what I have going on today. This painting began as a body landscape and is still really reading that way to me. Thinking while I was working today, the phrase "she lost her head and followed her heart" kept repeating in my mind. Turn this image 90 degrees clockwise and you really see that...
Float.

Friday, November 13, 2009

Helen O'Toole
"First Cut"
oil on canvas
78" x 58"
2008-2009


Last night I went to an incredible panel discussion at Kitteredge Hall.
The artist speakers were Helen O'Toole, Danila Rumold, Mary Ann Peters, and Eric Elliot.
I had seen work by all of these artists except Mary Ann in Seattle prior to this discussion, but was inspired anew by this exhibit. Their radical honesty, insight into their practices, and the evidence of their hard work, left me full. Some of their comments that truly resonated with me and that I continue to reflect on, are at the end of this post.
Here is a piece of Helen's from the exhibit. This photograph, of course, does not honor it as I would hope, but it gives you an idea. Helen's work takes you to an internal landscape - a place of emotion and mystery. It is a personal and beautiful place. An honest place.

Everything can change in an instant...Ideas as a hum in the mind...the idea comes in the middle of the process...what habits limit...defying the idea of a "body of work"...work that is shown is only one reflection of an artist's life long changing practice...Everything can change in an instant... the Lotus Sutra...Dual notions...beauty as a seductive tool to introduce other topics...art that causes discomfort...Everything can change in an instant.

Practice

Form Study - Wing
oil and cold wax on paper
18" x 24"


I am in a place right now where satisfaction is hiding from me. I am stretching and wandering - bumping into things and then reaching again. This piece is just one example of the many things I am exploring right now. I think this place of being unhinged began as I shifted my thinking into ideas of form as "body" and body as history/landscape. Some very exciting, yet fleeting, things have been happening - only to be lost again as I become uncomfortable with the literal images that begin to emerge. What seems to be tricky for me is holding an idea of an "object", the body, but still trying to remain abstract with it. What I am learning is that because my attachment to form is so definite, if I want to work in the abstract, it is better to simply focus on general ideas or moods, rather than specific forms. I am not ready to truly bring the figure back in. I am going to redirect my thinking away from it and back to ideas of color, space, mood and form without attachment. When I do bring the figure back, I can tell a great deal will happen. Just not yet.

I just had a trick or treater come to my door. It is November 13th. He was pretty cute, but I still told him to come back in 334 days...

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Time

Forms
Oil and Cold Wax on Canvas
18" x 24"





















Final Splash

This was the first abstract painting. It has been being reworked for that long. I have broken all my previous unkept records for length of time staying with a painting.

What is missing?



The "ball" was really bothering me - so ultimately, it had to go.

Ok, so I had yet another inspiring meeting with Helen, and the exploration feels so vast as things change and then change again. An idea that came up in our meeting that is completely taking over my internal mechanisms is the body as landscape. Wow. SO much to say there. Time will unfold and reveal it all for me.

Monday, October 12, 2009

There is no linear movement

"Splash (3)"
Acrylic and Oil on Paper

38" x 48"

This is one of those pieces that I put aside, and recently pulled out again and reworked. I am much happier with the areas of atmospheric transition in this piece, as well as the serendipitous little areas of under-painting peeking through. There are areas of heavy texture that may be tough to pick up in this image, that also give the piece a satisfying feeling of weight and movement for me. I am also happy with the way the texture contrasts with the thinner areas where depth is apparent. The sphere may need to be softened and modeled, but I am letting it rest and dry for now.

I have many other pieces going in the studio and am noticing that form and depth, as defined by edges and temperature, are becoming my consistent distractions. This feels good and I believe it will make a nice bridge to bringing imagery back in eventually. The focus is shifting. It is also becoming easier for me to work with smaller formats and tune in to a more intimate scale.

On a parallel personal note that I believe reflects the ever present art/life connection, I noticed something interesting on my run yesterday. I often use visualization to help me get through a tough part of a run. As I was heading up an enormous hill yesterday the visual aids began, but instead of giant eagles surrounding me, throwing their magic lassos around me and pulling me up the hill, a stronger version of myself leaped from my heart to dance and skip around me, beaming and encouraging - guiding me up and up. Forms are changing. Work is changing. It is all beautiful and I am listening.

Friday, October 2, 2009

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Listen

Listen Form 2
Oil and Cold Wax on Paper

18 x 24






















Listen Form
Oil and Cold Wax on Paper
18 x 24




















Today marks the half-way point of my first semester of graduate school, and my Mother's 87th birthday. It is also the first day of a new chapter of my life.

I had another really good meeting with Helen today, that filled me with renewed inspiration.
These two pieces represent my continuing experiments with abstraction. As I strive to create form, depth, atmosphere, emotion and resonating color that communicates, within a work without pictures, I meet questions of time, materials and scale. I sit with these questions and they bring their friends along. I will hold the intention of energy, gesture, radical honesty, and spontaneous response throughout the journey of each piece. I will let the painting take as long as it needs to. I will keep looking. I will listen.

My Practice, My Life.

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Experiments in Green; Final Parting?

Green 1
Acrylic on paper
In Process

Recently, I have been doing a great deal of experimenting. The top two pieces here reflect a couple of sessions where I am primarily playing with a color I rarely ever use: Green. I am also continuing to think a lot about depth, as well as marks that divide, dangle/float, and reach. Contrast is always on my mind.

I find that I really respond to the first push of the painting, and as I continue to work on it, the initial momentum of the piece often morphs into something else. This happens most radically when several days go by between painting sessions. This can work for me, as the layers I continue build often strengthen the overall work, but of course it also often backfires and leaves me with nothing to show for hours of work except a very heavy, paint-laden piece of paper. Of course there is the benefit of what the hours give me in experimental experience, which I am not disregarding. I am however, trying to find a way to capture the energy of my first attack, AND build a rich and interesting surface. Working in series and on many pieces at once are two ideas that immediately come to mind. Any other thoughts would be welcome! I know this is not a new issue for me, or for lots of other artists out there.



Green 2
Acrylic and Oil on Canvas
In Process



























"Parting"
Oil and Cold Wax on Paper

Ok, I am stopping now.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

the Parting continues...

"Parting"
Oil and Cold Wax on Paper
38" x 50"
in process


Ok, well this painting just won't stop. It has changed radically several times, and all you can probably recognize from it's last posted version, are the small glimpses of pink and yellow shining through here and there. I was just not satisfied with the palette, or the composition. Neither felt right, so I have been working and re-working it. This is where I am now - swinging back close to where I have been before, but wanting to be here as it feels unfinished still, and like where I need to be. I feel the tension between the surface and the illusion of depth - still intrigued by this palette with its beautiful darks and greys, and ochre light. These colors bring me to the sky, transitions of storm and light, day and night. Back to work - still going...

Double click on image for a better read of the surface.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

A day for small studies and re-working...

"Fly or Fall" Reworked

After an inspiring crit with Helen, I am spending the day today reworking several pieces, and starting a couple of new things. Here is the most recent version of "Fly or Fall" in which I am trying to better define the spatial relationships and make the reds a bit more saturated. Among other wonderful ideas, Helen encouraged me to flip the pieces upside down in order to see them more clearly - a great tip!













Study 1 Oil on Paper
10" x 12"
These small studies are inspired by abstract photos that I take of value, texture and color in nature. I was more than a bit frustrated by the experience (fighting with the scale, feeling hemmed-in by the photos), but after my crit with Helen, I was able to see some beauty in these pieces, and especially appreciate that they tend to be much more detached from narrative than the larger pieces. After looking at them with fresh eyes, thanks to Helen, I am actually excited to do more of these.



Study 2 Oil on Paper
10" x 12"
Another aspect of these smaller works that I appreciate, are the palettes. It is rewarding for me to use more muted color combinations, developed from my experimentation with Helen's palette ideas. I hear new voices from these color choices.

Updating this blog after painting is making a very painterly object out of my keyboard...

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Critical Theory - Paper #2

The Ritual of Change; Mark Making During Transition

Hesperian sadness; the quiet acknowledgment of the passage from day to night, with stillness and attention. A Shabbat dinner; a meal recognizing the end of the workweek and the beginning of the Sabbath. The ball dropping in Times Square; a communal marking of the end of the year as defined by the Christian calendar. Transitions, large and small, announce change. How do we as individuals, and as community, define the space between what we leave behind, and what we step into? What ritual marks this passage? These are questions that I have been fascinated with since I began studying folklore in my undergraduate years at the University of Pennsylvania.

Judy Chicago is an artist that I share my interest in both folk culture, and ritual with. In her well-known work, “The Dinner Party”, Chicago pays homage to the folk art of talented women found in myth and history. She describes the ritual of the dinner party with her piece, and gives voice to the creative talents that enacted these labor-intensive rituals. The women Chicago references channel their creative energies and skills into acceptable forms of expression for their time and culture. Together, they form communities with each other that lead to a larger ritual of sharing and communication within their groups. Chicago recreates this communal act of creation with modern artists still well versed in the folk arts that she is exploring as she facilitates the vision of her piece (Fabozzi 320). In this way, Chicago connects the rituals of the past with her more modern creative force.

17 years beyond my introduction to folk culture, I am actively involved in the exploration of folk music and the rituals surrounding its creation and dissemination. I play in a Klezmer band (music of the Eastern European Jewry), and am enamored with the tunes and songs that different cultures use to describe and navigate transitions. The notes that I play on my fiddle are akin to the marks that I make in the studio. The music and the mark making are both holding the space for the transition between what was and what will be. They tell the story of change.

As I reflect on the changes within my own life, and the role that my artistic practice plays in it, I am beginning to understand that my studio is the space of ritual where the marks that I make communicate the personal and public changes that occur around me. While I am not interested in using my artwork as a form of therapy, I do understand that through my work I am navigating change, and defining transitions through my ritual of painting. In this paper I will explore how other artists have used the mark as a tool to navigate change, and examine the questions that their practices or opinions raise for me as I analyze my own work, and the ritual within it.

War. What a powerful word, and what an immense vehicle of change. How have artists responded to such devastating and unasked for change? I found the answer to this question in the current Seattle Art Museum exhibit, “Target Practice, Painting Under Attack, 1949 - 78”, curated by Michael Darling. The voices in this exhibit are responding in a clearly visceral way to both the world changes that are occurring during their lives, such as World War II, Hiroshima, the Korean War, the Eisenhower years, and Vietnam, and cultural changes in how artists and the public consider painting itself. What I find most compelling in the exhibit are the artists that are actively processing traumatic change through their paintings – specifically, the type of marks that they choose to make to bring themselves, and their artwork, into the future.

Lucio Fontana, was an Argentine painter that lived and worked in both his native Argentina, and Italy during the second world war. After seeing an image of Fontana standing outside of his Italian studio after it had been reduced to rubble by bombings, I understood the incisions in his canvases in both a visceral and cerebral way. Considered a late modernist “heretic”, (Morgan. 18-19) he was consistently interested in the future, and described the razor knife slashes and punctures in his canvases in terms of an understanding of what lay beyond the current moment:

“I make holes, infinity passes through them, light passes through them. There is no need to paint.” (qtd. in Fisher)

Fontana’s eloquent description of his practice and what it means to him, speaks directly to the act of painting as a passage, or portal into the future. Through destruction, Fontana is actively creating a new space, or future, for himself.

Working on the other side of the globe, but simultaneously facing destruction on a grand scale in his home in Japan, Shozo Shimamoto also turned to the mark as a way to process change and move into the future. Puncturing and covering the surface of his canvas with gestural tears and nervous pencil line, Shimamoto viscerally and elegantly brings us into the future through his process of dakai, translated as “destruction as a constructive site” (Darling 106). Shimamoto’s canvases mark the event of his creation with their aggressive confrontation to the viewer, but retain a poetic elegance and fragility that speaks to the fleeting nature of reality. Shimamoto’s work is mediated by the titles that he chooses for them. “Work”, “Ifu” (Awe Inspiring Fear), and “Mother”, are titles that all further take us into the past and future of our own life-transitions (Darling 113).

Fashion model turned avant garde artist, Niki de Saint-Phalle joined her artistic comrades ideologically through her work that used the rifle as a paint brush. Exploding containers of pigment with rifle fire, Saint-Phalle speaks to the liberation of her mark marking ritual:

“We want to find a renewal. We want to find beauty in a new way. Making my paintings is life itself. The shooting is magic. The shooting is the moment.” (qtd. in Darling 24)

How does an artist decide what marks best communicate their ideas, emotions, intentions? How is the ritual played out in the studio? Is it planned ahead of time and scripted like a Catholic Mass, or is it a spontaneous response dictated by the moment? I have only recently begun to examine these questions, but know that my practice has been largely a spontaneous response, without much analysis up until recently. My current understanding of what happens in the studio is revealing that it is actually a mixture of analysis and spontaneity, a combination of control and reaction. While I may believe that I am composing ritual and opening a space for change to enter in, I am also working within the context of many other influences that act upon me both consciously and unconsciously. My work is mediated by my imagination as I consider forms that speak to a larger meaning I am expressing. My marks are also mediated by my memory as I work from what I recall without pictorial references to guide me. Just as the artists in “Target Practice” were each affected by their times, I am only beginning to be consciously aware of the cultural mediators that form the backdrop of the world I am surrounded by.

In his essay, Post Modernism and Consumer Society, Frederic Jameson speaks to his understanding of the complexities of mark making and the influences that define them. As he reflects on the views of French psychoanalyst, Jacques Lacan, Jameson describes the fluidity of the signifiers in language, and suggests that as meaning becomes more fluid, our grasp of reality may also become less stable. Jameson stresses that because we do not translate words into their meanings on a one-to-one basis, but rely largely on context, the connections between words form our experience of continuity and time. The relationships between words (signifiers) and their meanings (referents) allow us to move through past, present and future (Foster 118-119). Just as language creates meaning and moves us through time, so to does the ritual of mark making in artwork. The inter-relations of the references the artist provides on the canvas have the ability to work together to transition the maker, and potentially the viewer, from the past into the future by virtue of providing a space in between entering and exiting where reflection and ritual can take place.

In my work, as I process transition in my practice, I often turn to pictorial references that symbolically represent change or transformation. Although these definitions are supported culturally, their meaning changes depending on the background and life experience of the viewer, or as Jameson describes, from their context. This leaves room within my pictorial work for many interpretations. As I turn away from the pictorial image, and experiment with expressing my intention with abstract marks, how does this new language change my ritual and my understanding of the relationship of my work to the larger world? In viewing Target Practice, I feel a resonance between the vocabularies that the artists are developing, apart from, and unknown to one another, yet in synchronicity. Does abstraction, and a more visceral approach to painting, open up a less mediated form of communication, in which the ritual of painting can speak to the changes we all navigate? While any mark, form, or image has the unavoidable potential to become contrived or representational, it is the job of the artist to move through the passages of exploring them with honesty, integrity and awareness.


“…I rubbed and scratched the paper until I tore holes in it, trying to reach something else, something more profound, to grasp the very essence of things.” (Nolde, Emil. qtd. in Chipp.146)

It is evident that artists use their practice as a response to the world around and within them. Chicago uses ritual to remember. Fontana, Shimamoto, Saint-Phalle, are all turning to destructive, often subtractive marks to express the moment of change. Their choices reflect the larger cultural shifts around each of them and their personal reactions to change. My own imagery, and mark making, has a similar visual connection to the quality of change I am transitioning through. My interest with strings, seams, horizons and the breaking, severing or expanding of these references informs my work. Looking for resonance, turning to ritual – are both ways that I am navigating a shifting landscape through my practice. When the landscape shifts because bombs, literal or figurative, were dropped, the marks we make in response cannot help but be mediated by that change. As I build upon a visual lexicon of marks and images that have come before me, of course their meaning will remain fluid and over time the definitions of my marks and images will take on their own lives, dependent on their surroundings. The personal meaning that was my intention during creation will eventually be lost. This is not something that I fear, but something that I believe has value. If the creation of a painting is a catalyst for movement, how can it be expected to stop moving once the artist’s hand is still? Part of the ritual is also releasing the work to become what it will, based on what meaning is ascribed to it tomorrow.

Recognizing a place for ritual, whether it is a dinner, a holiday celebration, the destruction or the creation of a painting, will help us all maintain a space where we can reflect with integrity on the speed of change, and our individual and communal passage into the future. The change is an act of creation in itself, and through the conscious recognition of our rituals, we can release what came before and step into what comes next. Painting is an active ritual. Through our mark making we will not only pull the future to us, but discover within ourselves a place between past and future where the most radical honesty resides, and a visceral language through which to share our passage.


Works Cited

Chipp, Herschel B.. “Theories of Modern Art”. Berkley, Los Angeles, London. University of California. 1968. Print.

Darling, Michael. “Target Practice: Painting Under Attack, 1949 – 78”. Seattle. Seattle Art Museum. 2009. Print.

Fabozzi, Paul F. “Artists, Critics, Context, Readings in and around American Art since 1945”. Upper Saddle River, Pearson Education. Print.

Fisher, Sylvia. Target Practice. Seattle Art Museum. Seattle Art Museum, Seattle, WA. 8/25/09. Docent led exhibit tour.

Foster, Hal. “The Anit-Aesthetic, Essays on Postmodern Culture”. New Press. New York. 1998. Print.

Morgan, Robert. Lucio Fontana. Sperone Westwater. Sperone Westwater. August 25, 2009.

Tuesday, August 25, 2009


"Parting 2" Acrylic 25" x 38"
In Process

"Parting" revisited...

"Parting 1"
Acrylic and Oil on Paper

38" x 50"

Today.

Layering oil on top allowed me to quiet some of the action, which is what I wanted to do. I also like the contrast of working fast with the acrylics, and then slow, with the oils.
Even though I feel the pictorial references in my head asking to come out come out come out, I am remaining excited about seeing what else develops as I continue to explore working without them. They will still be there, I am sure, when I invite them back in.

Saturday, August 22, 2009

Holding the Space

"Parting 1"
Acrylic on Paper
38" x 50"

In process????

This is my first experiment with Golden OPEN acrylics. They certainly stay open longer than the trad acrylics, but they don't have anything on oils. You can tell by my marks how quickly they still dry. I am going to keep using them and experiment with a slightly smaller scale to gain more flexibility. I started this piece today with a very specific idea that I was only able to partially hold the space for. The painting always has a voice, as do other variables, such as the behavior of the paint, and of course, my facility. This idea of parting, seams, horizons, is continuing to resonate with me and I am looking forward to doing at least a couple more paintings in this theme. I may just let this one sit for a bit - I am not sure if I feel that it is really finished, and think I need to start another "Parting" or two, to figure that out. The pallete is my first try with a combo that Helen suggested, based on saturation.


"Fly or Fall"
Oil on Paper
29" x 50"


OK! Well, I spent about a month on this painting and it caused me some despair. The idea was to recreate a previous representational painting abstractly. I chose "Fly or Fall" because it was one that has been responded to very strongly, most recently by Helen, my mentor. I love the idea of working this way, but what I learned, among many things from this process, is that I should pick recent paintings with themes that I can still loudly feel. "Fly or Fall" was originally painted about one and one half years ago, and its poignant theme has since been resolved in my heart. It was quite difficult for me to hold the space for this painting as I worked, and I found myself drifting to more current ideas as I worked, and having to muscle the painting back to my intention. It took some time, but I am happy with the outcome and feel that this piece speaks to the idea of "Fly or Fall" from a more abstract place, which was my goal. It was also wonderful to work with oils on this scale again! I am in love with real Cadmiums, don't regret spending oodles of money on the real deal, and will forever be addicted to M. Graham paints with fabulous, non-toxic walnut oil! Huge thank you to Helen for pointing me in this direction.




Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Jacqueline Humphries
http://jacquelinehumphries.net/welcome/welcome.html







Susanna Coffey
Water Years
oil on linen
2006






Joan Snyder
Free to Imagine
Acrylic, Pencil, Oil, on Paper
36 x 72"
1985